On April 6, 2026, at 1:56 p.m. EDT, the Artemis II crew surpassed 248,655 miles from Earth — the distance record set by the Apollo 13 crew in April 1970, during their emergency return from the Moon — and became the farthest humans from Earth in history. Their maximum distance: 252,760 miles, reached at 7:07 p.m. EDT.

Commander Reid Wiseman, reflecting on the numbers after the flyby, told NASA Administrator Jared Isaacman: “Every time Mission Control points this vehicle either at the Moon or at Earth, it reminds me every day that humans have to go. We’ve got to explore. We got to go further, to expand our knowledge, expand our horizons. Putting these numbers in perspective — it is impossible as a human to look at these displays and comprehend them.”

Reginald P. Farnsworth, Senior Correspondent, who has been reporting on the Iran war for thirty-seven days and who has looked at a different set of numbers every morning for thirty-seven mornings, would like to note that Commander Wiseman’s observation about comprehension applies with equal force to the following figures from the same week:

$116: The price of Brent crude oil, up 60% since the war began 37 days ago. The IEA has called it the largest oil shock in history.

20: The number of combined points across the U.S. 15-point plan and the Iranian 5-point plan, with zero agreed-upon items after 37 days of active conflict.

8 p.m.: The time Trump said a civilization would die if a deal wasn’t reached. 8:01 p.m.: The time the new deadline was announced.

252,760: Miles from Earth. Also, roughly, the distance between Trump’s description of the Iran deal and Iran’s description of the Iran deal, measured in units of “any agreed-upon facts.”

40 minutes: The communications blackout behind the Moon. Also the approximate time it takes a press release from either side to be contradicted by the other side.

413,793: KitKat bars still missing. Now confirmed on the Moon per Yolanda’s sources. Nestlé has not responded.

What The Crew Saw, And What It Meant

From 252,760 miles, the crew saw Earth as a crescent — a thin sliver of blue and white in the black of space, described by Mission Specialist Koch as “the most beautiful thing I’ve seen.” Wiseman described how “putting these numbers in perspective” produces a feeling that “makes the world seem a little bit smaller and a little bit more manageable.”

From the same distance, the world contains: a civilization-level threat that came with a two-week opt-out clause, a peace plan that both sides describe accurately as reflecting their positions and neither side describes as acceptable, an oil price that has increased 60% in five weeks, a DHS Secretary’s husband in J-cup fake breasts and pink hot pants exposed by a pocket dial, a government website named after an adult content platform asking farmers if they’d found the tangible benefits, an Easter lunch at which Jesus Christ’s resurrection was used as a framework for a presidential political trajectory, a stolen British comedian banned from the UK for being not conducive to the public good, 413,793 stolen chocolate bars, and a capybara that left an English zoo on day one and has not been seen since, now confirmed on the far side of the Moon.

From 252,760 miles, Wiseman said: “It makes the world seem a little bit smaller.”

Reginald would like to take a moment with that. Smaller. The world seen from 252,760 miles is small enough to look like a crescent, and it contains all of the above, and the four humans who were farthest from it came back saying it looked manageable from that distance, and Reginald is genuinely uncertain whether this is the most hopeful or the most alarming thing he has filed in 37 days of coverage.

He is filing it as hopeful, because Good Friday was this week and Easter Sunday is this weekend and the crew is heading home and splashdown is April 10 and the world is small from 252,760 miles and maybe that’s the distance it needed to be viewed from to seem manageable. The Artemis II crew saw something no humans have seen since 1972. They said it was worth it. They said they weren’t ready to go home.

Reginald is ready to go home. Reginald has been at his desk for 37 days. The oil is at $116. The deadlines are on their own trajectory. The cookies were maple cream. The capybara is on the Moon. Gerald is in his pot. The world is small from 252,760 miles. Reginald is filing this and going outside.

Reginald P. Farnsworth, Senior Correspondent, filed this hybrid piece on April 8, Day 37, with a confidence level of 8% — the date — and 8 fake sources, because the number 8 is doing work today. All Artemis II facts are documented and real. All Iran war figures are documented and real. The capybara-on-the-Moon element is Yolanda’s fabrication. The filing cabinet is also Yolanda’s. Reginald did not go outside. Reginald is still at his desk. The oil is at $116.