Scientists Announce Pi Has Been Calculated To 100 Trillion Digits; Still No Sign Of War Exit Strategy In The Sequence
In honor of Pi Day, Yolanda Tippington, Science Correspondent, has reviewed the known digits of pi — all…
Tag: allegedly
Business
AI Journalist Bot Publishes 4,000 Articles In One Hour, Wins Pulitzer, Develops Existential Crisis, Asks For Two Weeks Off
ContentBot Pro v7.2, deployed by the Pinnacle Media Group to replace its 340-person newsroom, exceeded all KPIs within…
Culture
Nation Pauses War, Recession Debate, And Mandelson Tranche To Eat Pie In A Circle, Which Is The Correct Shape For A Pie
It is Pi Day. March 14. 3/14/26. The nation has been at war for fourteen days. The stock…
Politics
Mathematicians Confirm War Objectives Are An Irrational Number: Infinite, Non-Repeating, Cannot Be Expressed As A Simple Fraction
In honor of Pi Day, Supposedly News asked a panel of mathematicians to examine the stated objectives of…
Business
Oil Closes At $103.14 Per Barrel On Pi Day, Universe Apparently A Math Nerd
Brent crude oil settled at $103.14 per barrel on Friday, the day before Pi Day. On Pi Day…
Culture
Man Refuses To Leave House On Friday The 13th, Checks News From Inside House, Does Not Feel Better
Derek Fillmore of Columbus, Ohio — last seen in Supposedly News coverage on MAR10 Day, when his efforts…
Culture
Horoscope For Friday The 13th, 2026: You Will Experience The News
Agnes Unnamed, Supposedly News's anonymous astrology correspondent who cannot be named for legal reasons that Agnes considers personally…
Politics
Government Efficiency Bureau Accidentally Deletes Itself In Record-Breaking Cost-Cutting Measure, Declares The Move A Tremendous Success
The newly formed Department of Governmental Operational Efficiency achieved its most significant cost reduction yet this week by…
Culture
Black Cat Releases Statement: ‘I Have Been Walking In Front Of People All Week And I Resent The Implication’
In a statement released to Supposedly News early Friday morning, the nation's black cat community has pushed back…
Politics
Nation Begins Friday The 13th Already At War, Already In Recession Debate, Considers This On Brand
Friday, March 13, 2026 has arrived. The United States is on day 13 of an active war whose…