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Sources confirm what we already suspected Area man reportedly has opinions Experts say things could be different, but aren't Developing story remains developing Local woman neither confirms nor denies

Image for: A Dadaist Liberal Satire Account Out Of St. Louis Has Been Producing Some Of The Most Widely Shared 'Real' News Of The Year; The Account Is Called The Halfway Post; It Has 'I Don't Report The Facts, I Improve Them' As Its Operating Principle; Its Latest Tweet About A Texas Televangelist Arrested For Cooking Meth Hit 2.4 Million Views; The Tweet Is Fiction; The Reason It Hit 2.4 Million Views Is That It Reads As Plausible; Millicent Would Like To Discuss Why

A Dadaist Liberal Satire Account Out Of St. Louis Has Been Producing Some Of The Most Widely Shared ‘Real’ News Of The Year; The Account Is Called The Halfway Post; It Has ‘I Don’t Report The Facts, I Improve Them’ As Its Operating Principle; Its Latest Tweet About A Texas Televangelist Arrested For Cooking Meth Hit 2.4 Million Views; The Tweet Is Fiction; The Reason It Hit 2.4 Million Views Is That It Reads As Plausible; Millicent Would Like To Discuss Why

On May 13, 2026, an account called The Halfway Post — a verified Twitter/X account operated by a…

May 18, 2026 Editor

Image for: Pastor Mark Burns Dedicated A 22-Foot Gold Statue Of Donald Trump At A Florida Golf Course And Then Issued The Single Most Theologically Indefensible Press Release In Recent Memory; The Press Release Specifically Stated That The Gold Statue Is Not A Golden Calf; Douglas Has Read Exodus Chapter 32; The Statue Is Called Don Colossus; It Was Funded By A Memecoin Called $PATRIOT

Pastor Mark Burns Dedicated A 22-Foot Gold Statue Of Donald Trump At A Florida Golf Course And Then Issued The Single Most Theologically Indefensible Press Release In Recent Memory; The Press Release Specifically Stated That The Gold Statue Is Not A Golden Calf; Douglas Has Read Exodus Chapter 32; The Statue Is Called Don Colossus; It Was Funded By A Memecoin Called $PATRIOT

On May 6, 2026, at the Trump National Doral Miami golf resort, a 22-foot gold-leafed statue of Donald…

May 18, 2026 Editor

Image for: Ronda Rousey Came Out Of Retirement After Nearly A Decade To Fight Gina Carano On Netflix And Won In Seventeen Seconds With The Same Move That Made Her Famous; The Move Is An Armbar; She Then Said She Wants To Have More Babies And Has To Get Cooking; Frank Has Counted Twice; The Number Is Still 17; The Number Is Still The Number

Ronda Rousey Came Out Of Retirement After Nearly A Decade To Fight Gina Carano On Netflix And Won In Seventeen Seconds With The Same Move That Made Her Famous; The Move Is An Armbar; She Then Said She Wants To Have More Babies And Has To Get Cooking; Frank Has Counted Twice; The Number Is Still 17; The Number Is Still The Number

On Saturday night, May 16, 2026, at the Intuit Dome in Inglewood, California, Ronda Rousey came out of…

May 17, 2026 Editor

Image for: The Venice Biennale Opened On May 9 And By That Evening Pavilions Had Closed Because The Artists Were On Strike Over Israel's Participation; Pussy Riot And FEMEN Protested Outside Russia's Pavilion Because Russia Came Back After Skipping 2024; The Biennale Has Been Operating Since 1895; This Is Not Its First Political Crisis; Millicent Considers It The Most Coherent

The Venice Biennale Opened On May 9 And By That Evening Pavilions Had Closed Because The Artists Were On Strike Over Israel’s Participation; Pussy Riot And FEMEN Protested Outside Russia’s Pavilion Because Russia Came Back After Skipping 2024; The Biennale Has Been Operating Since 1895; This Is Not Its First Political Crisis; Millicent Considers It The Most Coherent

The 61st Venice Biennale opened on Saturday, May 9, 2026. The Biennale is the world's oldest and most…

May 11, 2026 Editor

Image for: The USS Gerald R. Ford Has Officially Exited The Mediterranean After Its Longest Deployment Since The Cold War; Iran Has Described The Strait Of Hormuz As Having Importance 'On The Level Of An Atomic Bomb'; A Cargo Ship Off Qatar Was Hit By An Unknown Projectile On Sunday; Patricia Has Been Watching The Strait For Weeks; Patricia Has Notes

The USS Gerald R. Ford Has Officially Exited The Mediterranean After Its Longest Deployment Since The Cold War; Iran Has Described The Strait Of Hormuz As Having Importance ‘On The Level Of An Atomic Bomb’; A Cargo Ship Off Qatar Was Hit By An Unknown Projectile On Sunday; Patricia Has Been Watching The Strait For Weeks; Patricia Has Notes

Patricia Unnamed-Source, Washington Bureau, has been watching the Strait of Hormuz for the entirety of this publication's run.…

May 11, 2026 Editor

Image for: Russia Scaled Back Its Victory Day Parade On May 9 Because It Was Afraid Ukraine Would Attack It; Putin Said During The Same Weekend That The War 'May Come To An End Soon'; A Three-Day Ceasefire Was Declared; Russia Launched A Drone Strike On Kharkiv During The First Day Of The Ceasefire; Reginald Has The Timeline; The Timeline Is, Once Again, The Argument

Russia Scaled Back Its Victory Day Parade On May 9 Because It Was Afraid Ukraine Would Attack It; Putin Said During The Same Weekend That The War ‘May Come To An End Soon’; A Three-Day Ceasefire Was Declared; Russia Launched A Drone Strike On Kharkiv During The First Day Of The Ceasefire; Reginald Has The Timeline; The Timeline Is, Once Again, The Argument

On Saturday, May 9, 2026 — the 81st anniversary of the Soviet Union's victory over Nazi Germany —…

May 11, 2026 Editor

Image for: A Luxury Expedition Cruise Ship Has Been Evacuated Off The Coast Of Tenerife After A Hantavirus Outbreak; The Ship Is Called The MV Hondius; The Outbreak Has Lasted Weeks; Most Of The American Passengers Are Being Flown To Nebraska; Yolanda Has Looked Up Why Nebraska; The Reason Is Boring And Very Important

A Luxury Expedition Cruise Ship Has Been Evacuated Off The Coast Of Tenerife After A Hantavirus Outbreak; The Ship Is Called The MV Hondius; The Outbreak Has Lasted Weeks; Most Of The American Passengers Are Being Flown To Nebraska; Yolanda Has Looked Up Why Nebraska; The Reason Is Boring And Very Important

On May 9 and 10, 2026, passengers aboard the MV Hondius — an expedition cruise ship that had…

May 11, 2026 Editor

Image for: Bobby Cox, Who Managed The Atlanta Braves For 25 Years And Won 14 Division Titles In A Row And One World Series And Was Ejected From 158 Games On Purpose To Take The Heat Off His Players, Has Died At 84; The Braves Called Him 'Our Treasured Skipper'; Frank Has Been Trying To Write This Without Crying And Has Failed; The Tribute Is Below

Bobby Cox, Who Managed The Atlanta Braves For 25 Years And Won 14 Division Titles In A Row And One World Series And Was Ejected From 158 Games On Purpose To Take The Heat Off His Players, Has Died At 84; The Braves Called Him ‘Our Treasured Skipper’; Frank Has Been Trying To Write This Without Crying And Has Failed; The Tribute Is Below

Robert Joe Cox — known to everyone in baseball as Bobby — died at his home in Marietta,…

May 11, 2026 Editor

Image for: The FBI Director Has Personalized Bourbon Bottles Engraved With 'Ka$h' And The FBI Seal; He Travels With Them On DOJ Aircraft; He Left One In A Locker Room In Milan; He Is Suing The Reporter Who Found Out; The FBI Is Investigating How She Found Out; The Bottles Are Woodford Reserve; The Dollar Sign Is In His Name; The Eagle Is Holding A Number 9; A Former FBI Official Burst Out Laughing When Asked About It

The FBI Director Has Personalized Bourbon Bottles Engraved With ‘Ka$h’ And The FBI Seal; He Travels With Them On DOJ Aircraft; He Left One In A Locker Room In Milan; He Is Suing The Reporter Who Found Out; The FBI Is Investigating How She Found Out; The Bottles Are Woodford Reserve; The Dollar Sign Is In His Name; The Eagle Is Holding A Number 9; A Former FBI Official Burst Out Laughing When Asked About It

FBI Director Kash Patel has been traveling with a supply of personalized Woodford Reserve bourbon bottles engraved with…

May 6, 2026 Editor

Image for: The Official White House Account Posted An AI Image Of Schumer And Jeffries In Sombreros Drinking Margaritas At The Border With A Sign That Says 'I Love Illegal Immigrants' For Cinco De Mayo; Schumer Responded With A Photo Of Trump And Jeffrey Epstein In Sombreros; 20,800 People Liked The Original; 15,600 Commented; A Mexican Republican Said He Was Offended; An Iraq Vet Called It 'Extremely Weak Trolling'; Yesterday It Was The Mandalorian; Today It Is Sombreros; Tomorrow Is Tuesday

The Official White House Account Posted An AI Image Of Schumer And Jeffries In Sombreros Drinking Margaritas At The Border With A Sign That Says ‘I Love Illegal Immigrants’ For Cinco De Mayo; Schumer Responded With A Photo Of Trump And Jeffrey Epstein In Sombreros; 20,800 People Liked The Original; 15,600 Commented; A Mexican Republican Said He Was Offended; An Iraq Vet Called It ‘Extremely Weak Trolling’; Yesterday It Was The Mandalorian; Today It Is Sombreros; Tomorrow Is Tuesday

On May 5, 2026 — Cinco de Mayo — the official White House account on X and Facebook…

May 5, 2026 Editor